What is Busyness?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nTo reduce busyness in our lives, we have to first understand what busyness is. Is it a set of behaviors? Is it an attitude? Or a perspective on life? Most people respond: \u201cAll three.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At a foundational level, busyness is the experience of feeling like we have more to do than we have time or energy \u2013 that there is not much \u201cspace\u201d in our lives. We are running from one task or meeting to another, often repeatedly throughout the day. Or sometimes, the sense of busyness comes from multitasking \u2013 trying to do more than one thing at once. Largely, busyness involves a sense of the needing to rush, to do tasks quickly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Busyness seems primarily to be an internal experience (we feel busy), but busyness also involves behaviors. Busy people can: have poor eye contact; not listen well; seem somewhat scattered, sometimes disorganized; appear to be rushing through tasks (and making careless errors); forget things (objects, appointments); interact in a short irritable way; and maybe most commonly, complain about how busy they are.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nWhat Drives Our Busyness?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nMultiple factors create busyness in our lives \u2013 and these influences vary across seasons in our lives and they differ from person to person. A brief list of \u2018busyness creators\u2019 includes:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nMultiple responsibilities.<\/em> Our responsibilities at work. Being married or in a committed relationship. Being a parent. Owning a home.<\/li>\n\n\n\nChanges in circumstances.<\/em> You are stuck in traffic, and running late for a meeting. The school calls and tells you that your child is sick. The printer is broken. A client shows up to meet unannounced.<\/li>\n\n\n\nThe desire to feel needed.<\/em> Feeling anxious about how others perceive our skills and abilities. Equating getting things done with personal value.<\/li>\n\n\n\nPersonal habits (and upbringing).<\/em> Being raised in a family where, if you didn\u2019t look busy, you were given a task to do.<\/li>\n\n\n\nTrying to be efficient.<\/em> Not wanting to waste any valuable time, so we pack the day end to end, without any space between meetings, calls or tasks to be completed.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\nThere are other factors that lead to our busy lives, but these provide a starting point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Overcoming Busyness: The First Step <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe first step that needs to be taken to reduce busyness is also the biggest hurdle we have to overcome. And this action is the point in the process where the most resistance and denial are faced: ownership of the problem.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nBusyness, to a large degree, is the natural result of choices we make. With a few exceptions, we<\/u> create our own busyness.<\/em><\/strong> Most of us want to attribute our busyness to external factors: the demands at work, our boss, the kids, what the school expects parents to do. But, in reality, our experience of busyness is a result of our own doing (although the choices that got us here may have been made a long time ago).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let me offer a historical example as evidence. For those who are old enough to remember, what happened in almost everyone\u2019s lives in the weeks following 9\/11 in 2001? . . . our lives slowed down. People chose to stay home in the evenings. Youth soccer practices were cancelled. A call to \u2018return to what is important\u2019 (relationships) was everywhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If we take an honest look at much of the busyness in our lives, many of the activities we choose to do are actually voluntary \u2013 listening to podcasts while driving or doing yardwork, going out to dinner and a concert, or taking the kids to a weekend sports tournament. And, I might add, many of these activities are driven by fear \u2013 fear of missing out, fear that your kids will get behind (so they\u2019re on a traveling soccer team at age 7), fear of not closing a deal (so we fly to see the customer versus doing a videoconference).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Combating Busyness: Can Anything Be Done?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nSome of our busyness is reality-based. We have tasks to complete for work. We need to take the kids to school. We need to make dinner, do the laundry, clean the house. But let\u2019s start by looking at the optional tasks and evaluating those. Do we need to accept the responsibility of providing cookies for this month\u2019s class party? And, if we do, do the cookies have to be homemade? Sometimes (often?) the best answer is \u201cno\u201d or \u201cI can\u2019t\u201d \u2013 although that chafes at our desire to be responsible (or appear to be <\/em>responsible).<\/p>\n\n\n\nReminder: The First Step<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nSo, let\u2019s go back and start with the first step: ownership.<\/strong> Busyness is not something that happens to you. Busyness is almost always a result of choices made. Do an honest review of your life and ask: What is contributing to this sense of busyness in my life?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nThen ask: Who made the decisions that led to these commitments?<\/em><\/strong> The point: If I made the decisions to get me here, I can make decisions to get me out.<\/p>\n\n\n\nAnd finally, ask (and answer): What can I<\/u> do to reduce the busyness I\u2019m experiencing? <\/em><\/strong>(This assumes you are okay with being \u201cunbusy\u201d \u2013 what would that look like in your life?) Like all life changes, start with one or two actions you can take right away, and work your path from there. Don\u2019t get overwhelmed and give up, saying to yourself, \u201cI can\u2019t. There\u2019s too much to overcome.\u201d One small step can<\/strong> lead to a wonderful lifelong journey!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Busyness seems to have risen to the level of addiction in our culture, and is even considered a badge of honor to some. When, for example, have you heard anyone report: \u201cI\u2019m doing great. I\u2019ve got lots of extra time and energy to do what I want?\u201d But how do we break this unhealthy cycle… Continue reading…<\/a>","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[160,63,2243,2143,34],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"yoast_head":"\nOvercoming Our Cultural Addiction to Busyness - Appreciation at Work<\/title>\n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n