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Yes, the title reads somewhat like a National Enquirer headline, but it’s true – focusing solely on avoiding taxes (whether capital gains tax, income tax, or estate taxes) can lead to family conflicts. This past week I had the opportunity to meet with a family, to review their wealth transfer plan and their plans for giving to charity. As is the case with many astute investors, this couple has experienced some significant growth in their assets as a result of some of their investments doing quite well. For example, one of their investments over the past year provided a 100%... Continue reading...
September 14, 2006 1:41 pm
This past Sunday, one of the lead articles in Parade magazine (the magazine inserted into millions of Sunday newspapers) was on emotional intelligence. The article was written by Daniel Goleman, who is one of the “founding fathers†of the concept of emotional intelligence and who has written groundbreaking books on the subject (I personally have found Working with Emotional Intelligence to be a helpful, practical guidebook on the subject.) In my work with successful business families across the country, I have had the opportunity to interview over 60 multimillionaires (usually, their net worth ranges from $20 million to $100 million)... Continue reading...
September 5, 2006 11:22 am
One of the biggest headaches for employers and managers is the process of finding new employees. Employee hiring takes a lot of time and emotional energy and most managers are not trained in the process. Add to this scenario the fact that there is a shortage of quality employees in a number of fields. For example, in a recent article in CFO (August 2006, Have CPA, Will Travel?), it is reported that there is are not enough accountants to go around for businesses in the industrialized world. Business owners tend to panic when they feel one of their key employees... Continue reading...
“Family coach†is a relatively new term – and a new field. There are maybe 10-20 of us in the United States. There are a lot of business consultants, and even a lot of family business consultants who assist the owners and managers of family owned businesses. But most consultants focus on the business side, because that is their professional background and area of expertise. The problem is – many of the challenges in owning and running a family owned business have to do with the family dynamics and relationships that can interfere with the business. This week, in the... Continue reading...
In my work with families across the country, most of them significantly wealthy families, one issue I continually address is the challenge of career development and college choice for young adults. Globalization, as Thomas Friedman has shown in his book The World is Flat, is a huge factor affecting career choices today (www.thomaslfriedman.com). “The great irony is that children from affluent families are given more choices than anyone else, but they are also less prepared than anyone to handle those choices. As a result, they are overwhelmed and they often respond to that feeling by voluntarily relinquishing their power of... Continue reading...
In this month’s (August 2006) edition of Worth magazine, there are a number of articles which deal with the challenge of successfully transferring wealth to the succeeding generations. This is an area which I focus upon professionally — helping financially successful families figure out “how much” to leave to their heirs, and how to do so in a healthy way. One article, entitled “Overcoming Entropy” by Stuart Lewis (who is a fourth generation heir of the Carnation food company), summarizes the process their family has gone through over the past few years. Almost sounding like a “poster child” for multi-generational... Continue reading...
One of the most common themes I have seen in relationships between older adults and their children (who are now adults themselves) is how the kids (although they are 25, 30, even 40 and beyond) still act like “kids”. And part of this is because their parents continue to come to their rescue when their children make poor choices. Parents want their children to be “happy” and, as a result, mistakenly intervene in their children’s lives when they should “let them be” and learn from their mistakes. Here are three additional skills required for healthy parent-adult child relationships. Set appropriate... Continue reading...
The dynamics between parents and their kids changes as both get older — this is true when children move from toddlers to school-age to teens and beyond. It is especially true when they become adults. Here are some new skills needed in these adult-adult relationships (from article, “The New Generation Gap” in the July edition of Worth). To a great extent, the skills needed to parent adult offspring well are the same as the same as the skills needed for parenting young children as well. These skills, however, must be applied in new ways as children age, as a relationship... Continue reading...
One of the trends that has become obvious in our culture is the issue of relationships between older adults — let’s say anywhere from mid-40’s (although that’s not old!) to eighty and beyond — and their adult children. These “adult children” range from late teen’s thru the 20’s & 30’s to individuals who are 40 and into their 60’s (sometimes older!). And we all know it is definitely weird to be “parented” when you are 40 years old. So recently, I coauthored an article which was just published in Worth magazine (www.worth.com) that addresses the challenges of developing healthy relationships... Continue reading...
Ok, friends, this is the beginning. The goal of this blog is to assist the myriad of individuals, family members, business owners, and people who work for family owned businesses to figure out how to successfully “put it together”. How do you live your life in a way that successfully blends your personal life, your family life and your career. As a psychologist who grew up in a family owned business, and who consults with families and businesses across the country, I am observing and (hopefully) learning some lessons that help make life go well — and choices and patterns... Continue reading...
