Author Archives for Paul White

About Paul White

Dr. Paul White is a psychologist whose focus is "making work relationships work". Co-author of the best-selling, The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace has sold 500,000+ copies. His company, Appreciation at Work, teaches employees and leaders how to communicate authentic appreciation, which improves employee engagement and organizational functioning. They have an online assessment, the Motivating By Appreciation Inventory (taken by 275,000+) which identifies the specific ways individuals prefer to be shown appreciation.

How Do You Change Your Culture?

January 27, 2025 9:36 am Published by Leave your thoughts

A healthy, positive culture is foundational to a healthy organization. But many companies are learning that their employees are unhappy and disengaged. It isn't that managers haven't been trying, but what they're doing hasn't been working.


Announcing a New MBAI Resource

January 13, 2025 11:06 am Published by Leave your thoughts

Help Us Answer an Ongoing Question about Appreciation To date, more than 425,000 people have taken the Motivating By Appreciation Inventory (MBAI) to discover their language of appreciation! Our goal in creating the MBAI has always been to provide relevant, practical and easily applied resources to help team members communicate appreciation effectively to one another. But over time, some relevant questions have come up. What if my supervisor changes? Or team roles and responsibilities have changed? Or if I work for a different organization? How stable are our desired ways of being shown appreciation over life stages and other changes... Continue reading...


What Employees Love and Hate about Holidays in the Workplace

December 9, 2024 10:05 am Published by Leave your thoughts

There are many factors to how holidays are handled in the workplace. Work schedules and demands, time off, decorations, and holiday parties all factor into how the season is incorporated into an office space and received by the employees who work there. We polled our readers to find out what they loved and hated about holidays in the workplace. We received nearly 3,000 responses! We explored both the good AND the bad because, while we attempt to focus on the positive and provide hope for improving workplaces, we are also committed to being reality-based. So, what did we learn? Clearly,... Continue reading...


Grateful Gatherings: Our Thanksgiving Poll Results

November 26, 2024 12:38 pm Published by Leave your thoughts

Last week we asked you to share about your Thanksgiving celebrations and experiences and over 200 of you responded! Our staff enjoyed reading about your traditions and dishes – from the familiar to the ‘new to us.’ There were lots of comments about the joys of spending time together, especially with relatives and friends that don’t live nearby, minor frustrations, and cherished traditions. ******* The Basics When asked how large your typical family (or friendly) gathering was, 12% of people expect 4 or fewer guests and 12% of people expect more than 20. The majority of people, around 76%, plan... Continue reading...


Do You Need Evidence-based Resources to Improve Your Culture?

November 4, 2024 10:04 am Published by Leave your thoughts

Many organizations only want to use resources or processes that have been demonstrated to be effective as supported by research. In fact, “evidence-based resources” has become a catch phrase in many circles. And understandably so – leaders and administrators don’t want to invest time, money and energy implementing a course of action to improve their workplace culture based on slick advertising or unfounded claims. That is why we at Appreciation at Work have been committed to verifying the practical utility and success achieved by using our resources through ongoing research. Let me summarize the foundation we have built over the past decade: To... Continue reading...


Toxic Workplaces Can Kill You (Really)

October 28, 2024 10:12 am Published by 2 Comments

There’s a difference between a bad job and one that is truly toxic. A toxic work environment can seriously affect your physical and mental health, even to the point of shortening your life.


Quality Time: A 5 Languages Spotlight

October 21, 2024 10:11 am Published by Leave your thoughts

Many people assume that appreciation is always communicated verbally. While using words is one way to show staff members that you value them, many employees prefer appreciation shown through the language of Quality Time. In fact, Quality Time is the preferred appreciation language for 26% of employees in the U.S. (or, one of every four of your colleagues). By Quality Time, we mean spending time with a colleague either by giving the person your focused attention, working collaboratively with them, or just hanging out and talking about non-work-related topics. You are showing that you value them by giving them your most... Continue reading...


Appreciation at Work: It Takes a System

October 14, 2024 9:59 am Published by Leave your thoughts

Appreciation is a powerful intrinsic motivator without which few people can sustainably perform at top levels. Unfortunately, the concept often gets caught up in the long list of platitudes about employee motivation and confused with recognition.


Do You Have a Blind Spot? What You Need to Know about Your Least Valued Language of Appreciation

September 23, 2024 9:38 am Published by Leave your thoughts

By nature, we all tend to speak our own language of appreciation. If Quality Time makes me feel appreciated, then I may go out of my way to stop by a teammate’s office and check in to see how they are doing. If Acts of Service make me feel appreciated, then I tend to pitch in and help my colleagues. If Words of Affirmation make me feel appreciated, then you can expect that I will give verbal praise to those with whom I work. But if I only do what comes naturally, the language of appreciation that is least valued... Continue reading...


Words of Affirmation: A 5 Languages Spotlight

September 16, 2024 9:43 am Published by Leave your thoughts

How to Use Words of Appreciation Effectively While Words of Affirmation is the easiest language for most people to understand and use, it isn’t always deployed effectively. Supervisors and managers often use words to encourage their team members. Compliments, a simple thank you, praise in front of others – are all common examples of using words to send positive messages in the workplace. We have found that following a few simple tips can make the use of words more effective in showing appreciation and encouragement to colleagues (and help you avoid some common errors, as well). To be most effective... Continue reading...


Tips for Making Appreciation Part of Your Daily Life

August 26, 2024 9:00 am Published by Leave your thoughts

Sometimes (maybe lots of times) we don’t actually do what we intend to do – even when we know the action would be good for us and for those around us. Despite our good intentions, communicating appreciation to others often falls into to this pattern: Let’s agree that behavior change is difficult. (Otherwise, we would all be in good shape and have no bad habits!) This premise is true at work, as well. Our lack of good habits is not usually due a lack of intent or desire, but rather, not fully understanding the power of habits and utilizing the... Continue reading...


Why Working at a School Is So Discouraging (and How to Help)

August 19, 2024 9:14 am Published by Leave your thoughts

The new school year is starting and, being honest, a lot of people are not real excited about that prospect (even if we exclude those students who want summer to extend a bit longer). If you work in a school (preschool, K-12, public or private) or have a family member or friend who does, there is a high likelihood that some feelings of dread are present. Why am I predicting negative expectations? Because, currently, schools are one of the most difficult workplaces in our culture to be employed. Consider the following factors:               Low prestige. In past decades, teachers and... Continue reading...


5 Languages Spotlight: Why Do We Still Include Physical Touch As a Language of Appreciation?

August 12, 2024 9:00 am Published by 4 Comments

The language of appreciation that usually raises the most questions (and, for some, the most controversy) is appropriate physical touch; the love language in personal relationships that is difficult to translate into a workplace setting. When we first started investigating how to best apply the love languages to work-based relationships, we utilized all five of the languages, even though we knew it would be a challenge to translate the language of touch. We found that the number and variety of these actions are fairly limited (high fives, fist bumps, congratulatory handshakes, or a pat on the shoulder), but are no... Continue reading...


Gifts: A 5 Languages Spotlight

August 5, 2024 9:16 am Published by Leave your thoughts

When comparing the various Languages of Appreciation, it’s easy to see that employees overwhelmingly don’t choose tangible rewards as the primary way they want to be shown appreciation. Only 6% of employees identify tangible gifts as their primary language of appreciation. They also choose tangible gifts as their least valued language almost 70% of the time. This is important to consider because most employee recognition programs emphasize giving gifts. While there is obviously nothing inherently wrong with this, companies end up wasting millions of dollars giving employees gifts that aren’t wanted and do little to improve performance and make them feel appreciated.... Continue reading...


Making People Feel Good ISN’T the Goal of Appreciation: An Effective, Functional Organization Is the Goal

July 29, 2024 9:24 am Published by Leave your thoughts

When some leaders hear the suggestion that it is good to show appreciation to their employees they respond, “I don’t care how they feel about their work. I’m not a cheerleader and it’s not my responsibility to make them happy — I’m here to make sure things get done.” Others are less direct, but the message is similar – why should I care how my team members feel (about work or themselves)? APPRECIATION IMPACTS THE FINANCIAL STATUS OF AN ORGANIZATION While communicating appreciation to team members does increase positive feelings across the workforce, ultimately, running a business, professional practice or... Continue reading...


Surviving One of the Most Toxic Types of Workplaces: Colleges and Universities

July 22, 2024 10:03 am Published by Leave your thoughts

When I started speaking about the 5 languages of appreciation in the workplace, an interesting pattern developed. During breaks, people would frequently relay stories about how nasty their workplace was or what a jerk their boss was. This happened so frequently that I became curious and concerned enough to start researching toxic workplaces (which resulted in our book, Rising Above a Toxic Workplace, and our associated video series). I started keeping track of the types of workplaces that were most frequently referred to as toxic, and five categories rose to the top: colleges and universities, hospitals, government social service agencies,... Continue reading...


Acts of Service: A 5 Languages Spotlight

July 8, 2024 10:28 am Published by 1 Comment

“Don’t tell me you care; show me.” This is a phrase often said by those whose preferred language of appreciation is Acts of Service. For them, actions will always speak louder than words and they feel appreciated when others reach out to help. More than 1 in 5 employees (22%) have Acts of Service as their primary language of appreciation (with another 15% having it as their secondary language). So over one-third of your coworkers value appreciation shown through practical actions that will help them do their work more effectively. How you help out a colleague really is situation specific.... Continue reading...


Celebrating the 4th of July with Gratitude for the Good in Our Lives

July 1, 2024 8:57 am Published by 1 Comment

Holidays often serve as markers in our lives – markers of seasons (the middle of the summer), reminders of prior years (what we did for the 4th of July when we were growing up), and touchstones for reflection (what are we celebrating and why). I love the 4th of July holiday largely because we have a legacy of wonderful family get-togethers that are a lot of fun and which evoke a large number of fond memories for me. And our family celebrations involve several traditions that I enjoy: being outside playing games, shooting fireworks, barbecuing, swimming and boating, and watching... Continue reading...