Categories for 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace
A question I frequently hear from those trying to create a culture of appreciation in the workplace is: “How do we continue the efforts over time so that a real change occurs?” This is always an encouraging question to be asked because it points to the individual’s desire to really make a difference in their workplace rather than just go through the motions or do a one-and-done training event. Let me share five guiding principles that can help appreciation “stick” in your workplace: Finally, the most important factors to help appreciation stick in your company’s culture are to utilize the... Continue reading...
At Appreciation at Work, one of our goals is to make it easy to apply the concept of communicating authentic appreciation to your daily work life. We have worked hard to provide a wide range of resources to meet the needs of various types of organizations – from small non-profit organizations and family-owned businesses, to schools, medical offices, government agencies, and multinational organizations. Sometimes it can be confusing to know: a) what resources are available; b) how they differ; and c) which one best fits the needs and culture of your organization. So, we thought it would be good to... Continue reading...
One of the core tenets of the appreciation at work system is that not everyone feels appreciated in the same way. And the more often we communicate appreciation in the language and specific actions preferred by our colleagues, the more likely we are to hit the mark in truly encouraging them and helping them feel valued. But, interestingly, from training thousands of employees in the concepts of authentic appreciation, we have found that: A person’s primary language of appreciation is often the language in which they are most easily offended! So, if you have a colleague or supervisor who seems... Continue reading...
People often ask: “What is a good way to find out how your colleagues like to be shown appreciation?” What Doesn’t Work Let me share a couple of ineffective ways to learn how your coworkers like to be appreciated, and then explain the best solution we’ve found. First, asking, “If I want to show you appreciation, what would you like me to do?” is a bad idea – largely because this is a weird conversation to have in most relationships. Also, you won’t typically get much useful information. Most people just respond, “I don’t know – tell me ‘thanks’ when... Continue reading...
Each workplace setting and group of employees is unique, which is why the Appreciation at Work materials are designed to provide practical, easy to use resources to help leaders and organizations build healthy workplace cultures. But sometimes there are challenges based on the structure of the industry, limited budgets, or the size of a work group that need special attention. Overseeing large teams is one of those unique circumstances. One example comes from Jack, a manager at a senior care living center, asked: “I ‘get’ the concept of communicating appreciation to my team and the need to make it personal and... Continue reading...
To build a successful and sustainable business, you need a team of employees who bring their unique abilities, strengths and perspectives to the challenges you will face. But to draw and keep talented individuals who have a variety of skills and personality types, you need a key skill: You have to learn how to lead people who are different than you. Many books on leadership provide valuable insights into key skills and abilities needed to effectively lead others. But one concept that is not stressed enough is: to lead a successful team, you have to understand those who are not like... Continue reading...
A vibrant workplace draws people to it — quality, talented employees want to work in a healthy context. A vibrant workplace is the result of an organization that has a clear purpose and mission, is rooted in the resources necessary to grow, and whose individual members work together to grow the organization and produce quality goods and services. In healthy workplaces, employees bring their own gifts and unique personalities to add to the synergy of a dynamic work setting. This is particularly relevant right now. Recent research by the Sloan School of Business at MIT found that during the recent... Continue reading...
By nature, we all tend to speak our own language of appreciation. If Acts of Service make me feel appreciated, then I will tend to pitch in and help my colleagues. If Quality Time makes me feel appreciated, then I may often go out of my way to stop by a teammate’s office and check in to see how they are doing. If Words of Affirmation make me feel appreciated, then you can expect that I will give use verbal praise to those with whom I work. If a high five energizes me and makes me feel appreciated, I will... Continue reading...
February 20, 2023 9:07 am
Since a larger proportion of the workforce has moved to remote and hybrid work, it seems reasonable to ask whether employees who work remotely have different preferences for being shown appreciation than those who work onsite. To find out, we conducted a research study with almost 90,000 individuals who had taken our online assessment, the Motivating By Appreciation Inventory. We found that Words of Affirmation continues to be the most desired appreciation language, but remote employees chose Quality Time as their primary language of appreciation more frequently (35% of employees) than workers on-site (25%). This finding seems logical – those off-site desire more... Continue reading...
February 13, 2023 9:00 am
A question I am asked fairly frequently is whether a person’s preferred language of appreciation changes over time. We don’t currently have a definitive answer for that but we are in the midst of researching it. However, there are some helpful data points which provide some direction. As we work with companies and organizations across the world, we have the privilege to discuss a variety of specific issues with our clients, hear their questions, and receive feedback from them. Let’s explore some factors we have observed that affect the primary ways individuals like to be appreciated. Life Circumstances First, one’s... Continue reading...
Change is difficult to accomplish – for individuals, groups, and especially organizations. While we can see the need for change, and want to help the organization (or our department) to function better, enacting change can be frustrating. In fact, there is a whole profession devoted to assisting organizations implement needed changes; they are called “Change Management Specialists (CMS).” The critical question is: What can you do when you are frustrated about the lack (or pace) of change in your organization? I’m going to give you some foundational, beginning steps with which to start and then refer you to an article... Continue reading...
December 19, 2022 9:00 am
Determining if you should give a gift to those with whom you work—colleagues, supervisors, managers, and direct reports – can be one of the more anxiety-inducing activities around the holiday season. If you do decide that you want to give an employee gift, the practical issue becomes: “What should I give them?” While some may think giving employees gifts isn’t valued in the workplace, many find these small tokens of appreciation go a long way. We conducted research with individuals who prefer being shown appreciation through gifts. Responses from 500 employees who were randomly selected out of a group of... Continue reading...
December 12, 2022 9:00 am
A major misconception many people have is that communicating appreciation is essentially a verbal act – saying thank you, giving a compliment, or sharing with a colleague why you appreciate them. So, when people hear the term ‘appreciation,’ many automatically think of words. The problem is: this is only part of the picture. Consider the following: If You Have to Use Words . . . While Words of Affirmation is the easiest language for most people to understand and use, they aren’t always implemented effectively. We have found that following a few simple tips can make a significant difference. To... Continue reading...
November 28, 2022 9:00 am
Our business is built around encouraging leaders and colleagues to show appreciation to their coworkers and training teams to do so effectively. But there are times and situations when we recommend not communicating appreciation (or, at least, waiting). Sometimes, encouraging your colleagues is not the best course of action to take. In fact, doing so at the wrong time can actually backfire and create more problems. Here are some circumstances when you should reconsider whether or not to proactively communicate appreciation to those with whom you work: When a relationship is tense. If you are in a work relationship that... Continue reading...
As we prepare to launch our newest industry-specific MBAI for Veterinary Clinics, we thought we would answer a frequently asked question. Why do we create industry-specific versions of our MBAI assessment? Here are a few of the factors that lead to their creation: Our goal is always to provide relevant, practical and easily applied resources to help team members communicate appreciation effectively to one another. We don’t want people who are taking the inventory to feel that it isn’t relevant to their industry or workplace. While our general workplace version of the inventory fits most office settings, some workplaces utilize... Continue reading...
When people are introduced to the concept of communicating appreciation in the workplace, a number of questions are frequently raised. Sometimes the questions seem more like a defensive response, with the individual putting up an obstacle that they hope will relieve them from having to take the topic seriously. But many times, the person seems to be thinking through how the concept would apply to their daily work life. So, let’s identify and address some of the most frequently raised issues. “I barely have time to get my normal, daily tasks done each day. How will I find the time... Continue reading...
Sometimes, when business leaders first hear about the 5 languages of appreciation, their initial response is, “Work is getting things done. I don’t care how people feel about it.” My response is that, while I understand their hesitation, the goal of appreciation isn’t to make others feel good (though that is a nice byproduct). The real goal is to help create a healthy, functioning organization. This distinction is important because good employees are not easy to find, develop or keep. And business owners and managers are at risk for misunderstanding how to keep their team members. Many believe their employees... Continue reading...
Successful companies and organizations have certain core values and commitments that run throughout their corporate cultures and are often visible in the services they offer and products they produce. When you think about Hilton, Chick-Fil-A, Southwest Airlines and Mercedes Benz, you know what you will be getting as a customer. This is because they have worked hard to make certain priorities and behaviors a part of their DNA. (If you don’t like or have the same values they do, you choose an alternative provider.) Hilton and Mercedes Benz provide quality and luxury at a higher cost to the consumer. Southwest... Continue reading...
When comparing the various Languages of Appreciation, it’s easy to see that employees overwhelmingly don’t choose tangible rewards as the primary way they want to be shown appreciation. Only 6% of employees identify tangible gifts as their primary language of appreciation. And they also choose tangible gifts as their least valued language almost 70% of the time. This is important to consider because most employee recognition programs emphasize giving gifts. While there is obviously nothing inherently wrong about this, companies end up wasting millions of dollars giving gifts to employees that aren’t wanted and do little to improve performance. This is especially... Continue reading...
Many people assume that appreciation is always communicated verbally. While using words is one way to show staff members that you value them, many employees prefer appreciation shown through the language of Quality Time. In fact, Quality Time is the preferred appreciation language for 26% of employees in the U.S. (or, one of every four of your colleagues.) By Quality Time, we mean spending time with a colleague either by giving the person your focused attention, working collaboratively with them, or (for some people) just “hanging out.” You are showing that you value them by giving them your most precious resource:... Continue reading...
Words of Affirmation is just one of the five ways employees like to be shown appreciation. And business and organizational leaders are constantly reminded how important it is to communicate appreciation to their staff — and it is. But sometimes a simple ‘thank you’ isn’t said often enough. When employees feel truly valued and appreciated, good things follow. Team members are less likely to leave for another job, complain and grumble, steal from the organization, or get hurt on the job. Conversely, they are more likely to show up for work (and on time), follow established policies and procedures, and... Continue reading...
“Don’t tell me you care; show me.” This is a phrase often heard from those whose preferred language of appreciation is Acts of Service. For them, actions will always speak louder than words and they feel appreciated when others reach out to help. Over 1 in 5 employees (22%) have Acts of Service as their primary language of appreciation (with another 15% having it as their secondary language). So over one third of your coworkers value appreciation shown through practical actions that will help them do their work more effectively. How you help out a colleague really is situation specific.... Continue reading...
How to Use Words of Appreciation Effectively While Words of Affirmation is the easiest language for most people to understand and use, it isn’t always deployed effectively. Supervisors and managers often use words to encourage their team members. Compliments, a simple thank you, praise in front of others – are all examples of common uses of words to send positive messages in the workplace. We have found that following a few simple tips can make the use of words more effective in showing appreciation and encouragement to colleagues (and help you avoid some common errors, as well). To be most... Continue reading...
While creating a workplace culture of appreciation is fairly straightforward, a number of practical challenges also exist. Research has shown that teaching leaders and colleagues how to communicate authentic appreciation to one another can make their workplaces more positive. And the impact has been demonstrated in medical settings, government agencies, nonprofit organizations, schools, multinational corporations, financial institutions and manufacturing firms. (Read the recent New York Times business section article* on the 5 languages of appreciation.) But, like trying to implement any change, obstacles can arise. After working with numerous organizations to implement the 5 languages of appreciation, we noticed some... Continue reading...
Understanding where conflict comes from Conflict at work happens – a lot. And it is a major source of stress for both employees and supervisors. It shouldn’t take you but a few seconds to recall a tense moment in your workplace — to remember the discomfort of watching a not-so-friendly disagreement in a meeting. Or to relive the sting of a critical comment made in front of your colleagues. One study found that, on average, each employee spends 2.1 hours every week (or one day per month) dealing with conflict in some way. Either being directly involved in a disagreement,... Continue reading...
Many of us have good intentions. We want to help improve our workplace culture, become more positive and supportive, and less combative and stressful. And many of us have tried, but have gotten stuck in their endeavors. Our efforts in introducing the 5 languages of appreciation to leaders and colleagues have either been met with a lukewarm response or started out well, but fizzled before getting off the ground (partly due to all of the challenges the COVID pandemic has created). But I would encourage you: Take heart! Steps can be taken to get you ‘unstuck.’ Remember: People Have Limited... Continue reading...
January 24, 2022 11:20 am
How Preferences Among Different Age Groups Should Influence Your Recognition Strategies If you approach communicating appreciation and recognition to employees the same, regardless of their age group, you are at high risk for missing the mark – including wasting your time, energy and the organization’s money. Recent research with over 190,000 employees found that how they prefer to be shown appreciation varies significantly, especially for employees in the youngest and oldest generations. Utilizing the five languages of appreciation model, we found that while the pattern of preferred appreciation languages generally carries across age groups, a shift is occurring. Historically over... Continue reading...
December 20, 2021 10:45 pm
HBR reports research demonstrating appreciation improves productivity The Harvard Business Review recently published an intriguing article, “5 Things High-Performing Teams Do Differently” based on research findings by Dr. Ron Friedman. “New research suggests that the highest-performing teams have found subtle ways of leveraging social connections during the pandemic to fuel their success. The findings offer important clues on ways any organization can foster greater connectedness — even within a remote or hybrid work setting — to engineer higher-performing teams.” And (surprise!) three of the five key characteristic actions they cited are core principles we teach in our Appreciation at... Continue reading...
