Categories for 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace
Our business is built around encouraging leaders and colleagues to show appreciation to their coworkers and training teams to do so effectively. But there are times and situations when we recommend not communicating appreciation (or, at least, waiting). Sometimes, encouraging your colleagues is not the best course of action to take. And doing so at the wrong time can actually backfire and create more problems. Here are some circumstances when you should reconsider whether or not to proactively communicate appreciation to those with whom you work: How do you avoid these pitfalls? 1. Check your motives. Try to only communicate... Continue reading...
You may be surrounded by co-workers that need to feel appreciated and be encouraged, and you may not know it. While some people show visible signs on their faces or in their body language that reveal they are getting discouraged or nearing burnout, many people are harder to read. They may not say much or have non-demonstrative facial expressions. Additionally, some of us are not especially talented at picking up subtle clues sent out by others. Here are some clues that you can watch for to help you know when your coworkers may need a message of appreciation or encouragement:... Continue reading...
This Friday, March 1st, is Employee Appreciation Day. And while the team at Appreciation at Work certainly applauds the thought, we want to encourage our readers to consider that authentic appreciation is something that can and should be practiced every day of the year, not just on a single, designated day. At the core of The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace is the knowledge that team members will feel valued when appreciation is communicated: regularly, through the language and actions important to the recipient, in a way that is personal and individualized, and in a manner that is... Continue reading...
February 26, 2024 10:02 am
Since its initial release in 1992, Dr. Gary Chapman’s The 5 Love Languages has become a cultural phenomenon. In addition to having sold over 20 million copies and being translated into 50 languages, the 5 love languages are frequently referred to in casual conversations – especially those related to romantic, marital, and family relationships. What is interesting to me is that many people are still intrigued by the concept of applying the 5 languages to relationships at work. True, the concept of love at work can seem a bit weird (especially if your definition of love is based on the... Continue reading...
February 12, 2024 9:53 am
For more than a decade, research with hundreds of thousands of employees has consistently found that giving tangible rewards to employees to show appreciation and increase employee engagement is a huge waste of money. Fact #1: In spite of companies and organizations, spending billions of dollars annually over the past decades ($16 billion in 2022 alone), Gallup reports employee engagement has actually decreased during the same time period to its lowest level in nine years. Fact #2: Research with hundreds of thousands of employees has repeatedly and consistently shown that receiving tangible gifts is the least desired way employees say... Continue reading...
How to Keep Appreciation Growing Most people have good intentions. We want to help improve our workplace culture, become more positive and supportive. And many of us have tried – by starting to apply the languages of appreciation with our team members — but have gotten stuck in our endeavors. For some, your efforts in introducing the 5 languages of appreciation to leaders and colleagues have been met with a lukewarm response, while for others the process started out well, but fizzled before getting off the ground very far. Let me encourage you: Take heart! Steps can be taken to... Continue reading...
January 29, 2024 10:28 am
Our best-selling book, The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace, has been revised and updated. Originally published as a hardback version in 2011, it was revised and released as a paperback in 2014. We then updated the content and research in 2019. Obviously, a lot has changed in the workplace since 2019. And new research, including our own, continues to be done in the areas of workplace culture, recognition and rewards, employee engagement – and appreciation. As a result, we worked this past year to update the book to reflect current trends and issues, and to cite the most... Continue reading...
While the primary focus of our work with the 5 languages of appreciation has been to help individuals learn how to communicate authentic appreciation in the ways meaningful to one another, we’ve learned that the flip side is also important. That is, how do you avoid inadvertently using actions to show appreciation that your coworker clearly doesn’t want? The goal is to communicate positively with one’s colleagues, so making them uncomfortable or even offending them is not what anyone really wants. Because we are committed to learning, growing, and improving, we began to explore the issue of avoiding unwanted acts... Continue reading...
In December 2023 we passed a milestone: over 400,000 individuals have taken our Motivating By Appreciation (MBA) Inventory to identify how they prefer to be shown appreciation at work. (This total includes individuals from over the past 12 years, including pre-COVID-19, during quarantine, and post-COVID-19.) In addition to celebrating this accomplishment (and offering a special discount – see below), we thought we’d also share some of the things we’ve learned over the years from the results of the inventory. Lessons Learned 1. The need for being appreciated hasn’t diminished and continues to be an ongoing desire. The number of people... Continue reading...
When people are introduced to the concept of communicating appreciation in the workplace, a number of questions are frequently raised. Sometimes the questions seem more like a defensive response, with the individual putting up an obstacle that they hope will relieve them from having to take the topic seriously. But many times, the person seems to be thinking through how the concept would apply to their daily work life. So, let’s identify and address some of the most frequently raised issues. “I barely have time to get my normal, daily tasks done each day. How will I find the time... Continue reading...
Feeling awkward about communicating appreciation among team members is normal. This “weirdness factor” is a common reaction when the 5 languages of appreciation are first introduced and teams begin to implement the concepts. It can feel particularly uncomfortable to speak words of affirmation to a colleague you aren’t used to talking to, or aren’t sure what kinds of words to use. What are common signs of people feeling “weird” about the appreciation process? Fear. Fear that others will think you are communicating appreciation “just because we are supposed to.” Fear that people will think your communication is not authentic or... Continue reading...
September 25, 2023 9:46 am
While creating a workplace culture rooted in appreciation is fairly straightforward, a number of practical challenges also exist. Even though research has shown that teaching leaders and colleagues how to communicate authentic appreciation to one another can make their workplaces more positive, getting everyone on board can be difficult. After working with numerous organizations to implement the 5 languages of appreciation, we noticed some common challenges and patterns emerge. As a result, we wrote The Vibrant Workplace – Overcoming Common Challenges to Creating a Culture of Appreciation, where we identify and address ten common impediments. You Are Not Alone One... Continue reading...
September 18, 2023 12:26 pm
Many front-line employees, and even supervisors, have concerns about communicating appreciation to their boss or those higher up in the organization – mainly for fear of looking like they are trying win favor or look good. While showing appreciation can be utilized in this way, most employees need not be concerned. Why? Because, over time, one’s true colors and intent will become evident. One occasion where these concerns come to the fore is Boss’s Day (celebrated on October 16th). At Appreciation at Work, we encourage people to communicate authentic appreciation year-round, but we also understand that this particular day can... Continue reading...
Workplace culture is both a hot and important topic in the world today. Companies, organizations, and government agencies are all struggling with the reality that they have seriously unhealthy workplace cultures. Yet many people (including leaders) have significant misconceptions about what creates “workplace culture” and whether or not (or how) it can be changed. Frequent results of these misconceptions include: a) individuals within the organization giving up trying to improve the culture because they view the situation as hopeless b) they want to do something to make a difference but don’t know where to start, or c) their attempts to... Continue reading...
I have had the privilege of traveling internationally to numerous countries to introduce the concept of authentic appreciation in the workplace. And from these experiences I’ve learned that appreciation and vibrant workplaces aren’t limited to certain cultures. And, more importantly, the need for appreciation in the workplace is deeply felt by the leaders and employees who work in these countries. Lessons from a Multinational Training Experience A few years ago, I had the opportunity to train the management and supervisors of an elite international organization in how to communicate authentic appreciation to their staff. Functioning within the tourism and hospitality industries,... Continue reading...
A question I frequently hear from those trying to create a culture of appreciation in the workplace is: “How do we continue the efforts over time so that a real change occurs?” This is always an encouraging question to be asked because it points to the individual’s desire to really make a difference in their workplace rather than just go through the motions or do a one-and-done training event. Let me share five guiding principles that can help appreciation “stick” in your workplace: Finally, the most important factors to help appreciation stick in your company’s culture are to utilize the... Continue reading...
At Appreciation at Work, one of our goals is to make it easy to apply the concept of communicating authentic appreciation to your daily work life. We have worked hard to provide a wide range of resources to meet the needs of various types of organizations – from small non-profit organizations and family-owned businesses, to schools, medical offices, government agencies, and multinational organizations. Sometimes it can be confusing to know: a) what resources are available; b) how they differ; and c) which one best fits the needs and culture of your organization. So, we thought it would be good to... Continue reading...
One of the core tenets of the appreciation at work system is that not everyone feels appreciated in the same way. And the more often we communicate appreciation in the language and specific actions preferred by our colleagues, the more likely we are to hit the mark in truly encouraging them and helping them feel valued. But, interestingly, from training thousands of employees in the concepts of authentic appreciation, we have found that: A person’s primary language of appreciation is often the language in which they are most easily offended! So, if you have a colleague or supervisor who seems... Continue reading...
People often ask: “What is a good way to find out how your colleagues like to be shown appreciation?” What Doesn’t Work Let me share a couple of ineffective ways to learn how your coworkers like to be appreciated, and then explain the best solution we’ve found. First, asking, “If I want to show you appreciation, what would you like me to do?” is a bad idea – largely because this is a weird conversation to have in most relationships. Also, you won’t typically get much useful information. Most people just respond, “I don’t know – tell me ‘thanks’ when... Continue reading...
Each workplace setting and group of employees is unique, which is why the Appreciation at Work materials are designed to provide practical, easy to use resources to help leaders and organizations build healthy workplace cultures. But sometimes there are challenges based on the structure of the industry, limited budgets, or the size of a work group that need special attention. Overseeing large teams is one of those unique circumstances. One example comes from Jack, a manager at a senior care living center, asked: “I ‘get’ the concept of communicating appreciation to my team and the need to make it personal and... Continue reading...
To build a successful and sustainable business, you need a team of employees who bring their unique abilities, strengths and perspectives to the challenges you will face. But to draw and keep talented individuals who have a variety of skills and personality types, you need a key skill: You have to learn how to lead people who are different than you. Many books on leadership provide valuable insights into key skills and abilities needed to effectively lead others. But one concept that is not stressed enough is: to lead a successful team, you have to understand those who are not like... Continue reading...
A vibrant workplace draws people to it — quality, talented employees want to work in a healthy context. A vibrant workplace is the result of an organization that has a clear purpose and mission, is rooted in the resources necessary to grow, and whose individual members work together to grow the organization and produce quality goods and services. In healthy workplaces, employees bring their own gifts and unique personalities to add to the synergy of a dynamic work setting. This is particularly relevant right now. Recent research by the Sloan School of Business at MIT found that during the recent... Continue reading...
By nature, we all tend to speak our own language of appreciation. If Acts of Service make me feel appreciated, then I will tend to pitch in and help my colleagues. If Quality Time makes me feel appreciated, then I may often go out of my way to stop by a teammate’s office and check in to see how they are doing. If Words of Affirmation make me feel appreciated, then you can expect that I will give use verbal praise to those with whom I work. If a high five energizes me and makes me feel appreciated, I will... Continue reading...
February 20, 2023 9:07 am
Since a larger proportion of the workforce has moved to remote and hybrid work, it seems reasonable to ask whether employees who work remotely have different preferences for being shown appreciation than those who work onsite. To find out, we conducted a research study with almost 90,000 individuals who had taken our online assessment, the Motivating By Appreciation Inventory. We found that Words of Affirmation continues to be the most desired appreciation language, but remote employees chose Quality Time as their primary language of appreciation more frequently (35% of employees) than workers on-site (25%). This finding seems logical – those off-site desire more... Continue reading...
February 13, 2023 9:00 am
A question I am asked fairly frequently is whether a person’s preferred language of appreciation changes over time. We don’t currently have a definitive answer for that but we are in the midst of researching it. However, there are some helpful data points which provide some direction. As we work with companies and organizations across the world, we have the privilege to discuss a variety of specific issues with our clients, hear their questions, and receive feedback from them. Let’s explore some factors we have observed that affect the primary ways individuals like to be appreciated. Life Circumstances First, one’s... Continue reading...
Change is difficult to accomplish – for individuals, groups, and especially organizations. While we can see the need for change, and want to help the organization (or our department) to function better, enacting change can be frustrating. In fact, there is a whole profession devoted to assisting organizations implement needed changes; they are called “Change Management Specialists (CMS).” The critical question is: What can you do when you are frustrated about the lack (or pace) of change in your organization? I’m going to give you some foundational, beginning steps with which to start and then refer you to an article... Continue reading...
December 19, 2022 9:00 am
Determining if you should give a gift to those with whom you work—colleagues, supervisors, managers, and direct reports – can be one of the more anxiety-inducing activities around the holiday season. If you do decide that you want to give an employee gift, the practical issue becomes: “What should I give them?” While some may think giving employees gifts isn’t valued in the workplace, many find these small tokens of appreciation go a long way. We conducted research with individuals who prefer being shown appreciation through gifts. Responses from 500 employees who were randomly selected out of a group of... Continue reading...
December 12, 2022 9:00 am
A major misconception many people have is that communicating appreciation is essentially a verbal act – saying thank you, giving a compliment, or sharing with a colleague why you appreciate them. So, when people hear the term ‘appreciation,’ many automatically think of words. The problem is: this is only part of the picture. Consider the following: If You Have to Use Words . . . While Words of Affirmation is the easiest language for most people to understand and use, they aren’t always implemented effectively. We have found that following a few simple tips can make a significant difference. To... Continue reading...
November 28, 2022 9:00 am
Our business is built around encouraging leaders and colleagues to show appreciation to their coworkers and training teams to do so effectively. But there are times and situations when we recommend not communicating appreciation (or, at least, waiting). Sometimes, encouraging your colleagues is not the best course of action to take. In fact, doing so at the wrong time can actually backfire and create more problems. Here are some circumstances when you should reconsider whether or not to proactively communicate appreciation to those with whom you work: When a relationship is tense. If you are in a work relationship that... Continue reading...